From Rabbi Dahlia Bernstein Friday, August 20, 2021
Dear CBO family,
Our Torah portion starts off with an interesting verse. Let’s see if you can spot the detail that will bother the rabbis most. “When you go out to war against your enemies . . .” You got it? The question that many of them grapple with is:
“Who else would you go out to war against?” These commentators believe that every word of the Torah has significance. Nothing is superfluous. It must add, “enemies” for a reason and I propose that sometimes we go to war against our friends and family as well.
Can you think of a time when you have gone to war against someone in your circle? Perhaps someone in your circle has gone to war against you? Married couples experience this. Parents and children feel it sometimes. Siblings certainly do. Recently this phenomenon has been more pronounced. Now we go to war with our neighbors over who they voted for, when, how, or if they wear a mask and their political stances about Israel.
It seems that there are two options: "Avoidance or war" And this creates an impossible scenario where no one feels like they can explore ideas with people. When did such black and white thinking become the norm? Notice if your mind is going into blame mode. Ongoing threats and perceived threats make our triggers more sensitive when there’s danger and when the danger is not actually as imminent as it feels.
I want us to be cognizant of this tendency and catch ourselves in the moment. So what is the alternative? Let’s think back to a time when you may have had a discussion with someone who disagreed with you and it was a civil conversation? Maybe you witnessed it between two others. Again, notice the negative voice that might pop up and answer that you have “never” seen such a thing. You’ll know you’re in black and white blame mode when the words, “never,” “always,” “should,” and “need to” infiltrate your thoughts.
I once watched two great scholars debate how to relate to Jewish law. This was not the first time they put on this “production.” It was for the sake of college students who were exploring their own Jewish practice. They disagreed without each other whole heartedly and they were friends. There was a little bit of teasing in their rhetoric, definitely laughter, and also respect and silence while the other one was speaking. No one interrupted the other.
If we don’t try to restore this kind of atmosphere, our society will continue to exclude nuance, friendliness, and curiosity from our conversations. We will become more polarized and the very dangers that we want to avoid with be strengthened. Make patience and observation a conscious choice.
Shabbat shalom, Rabbi Bernstein
For catering purposes, we kindly ask that you CLICK HERE to RSVP by Sunday, September 19th, 2021.
CLICK HERE to check the schedule of upcoming events some events will still remain on zoom.
MINYAN REQUEST Jesse Scharf requests a minyan on Thursday, August 26th at 7:45 PM on Zoom. He has yahrzeit for his mother Molly Feibish.
Susan Gardner is requesting a minyan on Tuesday, August 31st on Zoom at 7:45 PM. She has yarhzeit for her father, Joseph Bernstein.
REFUAH SHELEIMAH (A SPEEDY RECOVERY)
As a community, we pray for those in need of healing. May they be granted a Refuah Sheleimah - a complete and speedy recovery.
Glenn Cohen Marilyn Finger Cal Greilsamer Wallace Leifer Edward Steinman
If you wish to request a minyan, you may contact the office or CLICK HERE to submit and let us know if you would like a Zoom or In-Person service.
Entry Point Presentation Monday, August 23rd at 7:30 PM on Zoom
We are honored to invite you to register for CSS's Entry Point training session which has been arranged by the leadership of Beth Ohr. This is a one-hour virtual training about the basics of security and how to help protect your community.
Topics covered include:
Security awareness
Identifying security threats
Recognizing suspicious activity
Reducing and responding to threats to your synagogue
How to contribute to the safety of your community
This is a standalone program and no background in security is required.
This live, interactive, and virtual session will be held via Zoom on Monday, August 23rd at 7:30 pm. CLICK HEREto register as soon as possible to ensure your participation.
When registering, please use the following information, as written: Synagogue: Congregation Beth Ohr Code: 98153582409
Affiliated with United Synagogue of Conservative Judaism