Dear CBO family,
In this week’s Torah portion, Vayechi, we read about the death of Jacob, the last of the three patriarch’s. The portion starts as Jacob nears the end of his life. He first calls for his son Joseph and elicits a promise that he not be buried in Egypt. He insists that he be returned to the cave where his parents and grandparents, Abraham, Sarah, Isaac and Rebecca were buried. It is his desire to be returned to his family, and Joseph promises to make it so.
Jacob then calls for Joseph’s sons, Ephraim and Manasseh. He blesses these grandsons and decrees that they will receive land and lead tribes equal to Jacob’s sons. Jacob sees that they will become great men and leaders and foretells that even in the future we will say “May God make you like Ephraim and like Manasseh." Jacob’s prophecy is fulfilled every Shabbat eve when Jewish parents begin the blessing of their children by offering this wish for their sons. Daughters are blessed similarly, but with our daughters we call to mind the matriarchs, saying “May God make you like Sarah, Rebecca, Rachel and Leah.” Ephraim and Manasseh were predicted by Jacob to be such great men as to rise to the level of the patriarchs and matriarchs.
Jacob then addressed each of his sons in turn. When he does so, he calls to mind not just their good qualities, but some negative ones as well. Like any father, he offers his sons rebuke where he feels it necessary.
What Jacob shows us though his words and actions is the importance of family. As he nears death, he calls for his children and grandchildren to come near. Even after death he knows he will desire family. He knows that the Israelites will eventually return to Canaan. He does not want his body left behind in Egypt. He wants to know that even in death he will be surrounded by family—his parents, his grandparents and his first wife, Leah. He wants to be in the land that his descendants will inhabit.
Jacob also shows us that within a family we can speak plainly, but with respect. We can correct each other’s mistakes and return each other to the right path. But we can do so with respect. Just as Jacob addresses his sons’ shortcomings, family members today can guide each other. But that guidance must be respectful, with an eye toward helping each other do good.
With Jacob’s passing, his other sons now fear that Joseph will seek retribution for their past misdeeds against him. Joseph reminds them that they have been forgiven. He reminds them that their actions ultimately lead to the family reuniting in Egypt to survive the famine.
Perhaps it is appropriate that we are reading this portion in mid-December. Chanukah has passed, but the secular school holidays are approaching and families will be getting together. As children and grandchildren return to school or visit over the next few weeks we should understand that an occasional disagreement arises. But mostly we should take joy in each other’s presence, as Jacob did. And we should forgive, like Joseph. And we should rejoice in the closeness and plan to be near each other in the future, like Jacob and Joseph.
Shabbat Shalom,
Brad Levien
